The holidays are here. It’s the most wonderful time of the year….for some people. Not everyone enjoys the holidays. In fact, therapists and doctors see skyrocketing rates of anxiety and depression during this time. There are a few reasons for this.
People want to make friends and family happy during the holiday season. If you struggle to say no, this can result in anxiety. It is impossible for you to make everyone happy all the time. It is also hard to live up to unrealistic expectations that society places on the holidays. Think of all the holiday movies we watch. What’s the main theme? In the end, it’s about family, joy, and peace. This isn’t always the reality, but we try to make it happen for others. This can cause anxiety to begin building.
The second reason for anxiety also stems from people pleasing. It’s feeling torn between families, groups, etc. Say you and your partner are trying to figure out where to spend the holidays: they want to see their family and you want to see yours. This is a recipe for anxiety if you are worried about letting anyone down.
Just because it’s the season of happiness and joy, doesn’t mean your family is somehow going to put aside any dysfunction. We tend to have very unrealistic visions of what the perfect holiday looks like. This often includes a picture of everyone in your family happy and peaceful. However, this expectation is rarely met because existing family problems don’t disappear, in fact, they can worsen during this season. Arguments, turmoil, unmet expectations all cause stress and anxiety.
You may be someone that is dealing with a loss this year. Whether this is the death of a family member, a separation, or a divorce, holidays can be triggering. The holidays remind us of what we once had. There’s a sense of nostalgia during this time. If you are facing this holiday season without a loved one, you may find yourself feeling increasingly anxious and depressed.
While the holidays can be an amazing time, it’s especially important to remember it’s not that way for everyone. If you are one of the many, many people that struggle during this time, please remember there are things you can do. You can focus on managing your anxiety through both thought exercises and specific behavioral plans. You can make sure you are eating, sleeping, and moving your body every day. Finally, if you are not improving, or feeling worse, you can see your doctor or a mental health counselor. Many of these professionals are offering telemedicine which means you can have your appointment from the comfort of your own home. By doing these things, you can manage your anxiety and still enjoy this special season.
To Health, Hope and Healing
Krista